11 Wedding planning tips you've never heard before
I’ve been shooting weddings for several years, and I’ve witnessed a lot of both great ideas and faux pas. Of course you can take my tips with a grain of salt, but these are things I’m either glad I did at my wedding, I wish I’d done at my wedding, or what I’ve learned from all my experience working weddings!
THE MORNING OF THE WEDDING
1) CROCHET HOOK
If your dress has lots of buttons, put a crochet hook in your bag to bring for the “getting ready” portion of the day. Buttons are WAY easier to fasten with crochet hooks. Don’t worry that these crochet hooks don’t “look nice” for photos. I usually don’t photograph most of the dress fastening, and I just grab some quick shots that are more posed to make sure everyone is decent and not awkward :)
Also, don’t forget to move the crochet hook into your evening bag… your maid of honor won’t be there when these buttons have to be unfastened, and your new husband may appreciate the help!
2) GO BRALESS
This one goes for both you and your bridesmaids, especially if dresses are strapless or backless. Bras will leave indents and take a long time to go away!! I once had a bride whose bra indentations showed through her backless dress even all the way through the ceremony. If you physically can’t go braless in the morning, make sure you’ve tested bras and you wear one that leaves as little indents as possible!
In related news, make sure you know your “boob situation” under the dress before getting ready, so you’re not fumbling figuring out which pasties work best while we’re supposed to be doing the first look.
3) DETAILS, DETAILS, DETAILS
Have ALL details ready and together by the time your photographer/videographer arrives. This includes the following, if applicable:
All stationery (invitation suite, menus, place cards, etc.)
All jewelry (including groom’s ring*)
Shoes (remove stickers from soles before breaking them in!!)
Veil
Hairpiece
Belt
Something old, new, borrowed, blue
Garter
Vow book
Depending on several factors such as timeline, your groom should be prepared with his details as well. This can include the following:
Tie/bowtie
Pocket square
Belt
Shoes
Socks
Cuff links
Vow book
Ring
*If your photographer/videographer does not plan on doing extensive groom details, please have his ring with all of the bridal details in order to capture all three rings together!
Extra pro tip: ask your florist for extra loose pieces! These will really heighten the photos of your details, and you can press these pieces as keepsakes!
THROUGHOUT THE WEDDING DAY
4) DO NOT FORGET TO EAT/DRINK
Designate somebody to check in with you to make sure you’ve eaten and had some water. This could be your mom or a bridesmaid. I know it sounds tempting to skip water so you don’t have to attempt to use the restroom while in your dress, but I PROMISE! You need to keep your energy up and keep healthy, and you shouldn’t skip either snacks or water.
5) SPEAKING OF the bathroom…
I luckily had a dress that I was able to go to the bathroom in by myself. However, I’ve been a bridesmaid who had to hold up the dress for the bride before! Things that help are: straddle the toilet, don’t sit normally. This helps to avoid your dress rubbing on the back of the toilet or on the wall… ICK! By straddling you’ll have a lot more control over the hold on your gown.
6) VEIL, BOUQUET, BUSTLE… HOW DO I MANAGE THESE?
The veil, bouquet, and bustle are three things you don’t ever worry about on a regular basis, so it’s hard to know when the time is right for each. Here are my suggestions after all my wedding experience! Of course, you should ask your photographer what he/she prefers, and the timeline may make a difference for this. So again, grain of salt.
VEIL: Put your veil on only right before the ceremony, even if you’ve done a first look. Many people think a first look may take away the magic from seeing each other in the aisle for the first time, but this tip helps bring that magic back in by him not seeing the whole thing before the ceremony itself. Plus, then you don’t have to fumble with it during the first look or have it tugged while hugging. Similarly, I suggest removing the veil before the grand entrance. HOWEVER, if all of your Bride + Groom portraits are taking place BEFORE the ceremony (common in winter), you will want your veil for the first look and portraits!
BOUQUET: Basically the same as the veil. It will only be in the way during the first look, because you’ll want to hug your man, hold his hands, etc.! During portraits it’s best to have a designated person who can hold the bouquet during shots you don’t need it. Sometimes this is the planner, MOH, or personal attendant.
BUSTLE: Leave your dress unbustled up until the grand entrance, then keep it bustled the rest of the night unless you go back out for sunset photos.
If you do romantic portraits at sunset, I highly suggest wearing your veil, bringing your bouquet, and undoing the bustle!
AFTER THE WEDDING
7) PACK A LETTER OPENER
Now, I don’t think this is much of a thing in Southern California, but where I’m from it’s very common to have a “gift opening” the day after the wedding that your family attends. I HIGHLY suggest bringing scissors and a letter opener for this! It’s a lot of envelopes and wrapping paper, and your fingers will hurt. My husband made fun of me so much for brining a letter opener, but halfway through our gift opening he was stealing it from me!!
8) HANG YOUR PHOTOS ASAP
This is a tip I wish I had done right when I moved into our new apartment right after our wedding. We were long-distance and didn’t live together before getting married, so there was a lot of work to do to make our first home homey. Our first apartment was small and always felt a little temporary to me, so I was hesitant to spend money on prints and frames. Well, we were in that apartment for 2.5 years, and it never felt homey in all that time. When we moved and I finally framed some prints, it really made the place come together. I now wish I had printed my wedding photos right away!!
MISC TIPS
9) BOW-TIES
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been shooting groom prep only to be sitting around and waiting while the guys watch Youtube videos…. on how to tie a bow-tie. Ladies, please make sure your groom and his guys know how to tie these BEFORE the wedding!!
10) HOTEL CHECK-IN
This logistic often gets overlooked. If you’re not checked into the “honeymoon suite” already before the wedding, you’ll need somebody to check in for you and give you the keys, because you’re not going to have time during the wedding day to do it yourself. I designated my super helpful cousin to check in for me while she was checking in for herself, and she gave us the room keys during the reception. She was also SO helpful that she moved my overnight stuff from my getting ready room into my honeymoon suite!! #rockstar It was amazing to not have to worry about any of this stuff.
11) YOUR “GETTING READY ROOM”
For your getting photos to come out best, the room needs to be clean and let a lot of natural light in. Here are some ways your space can be photo-ready before I even arrive!
Choose a south-facing room for lots of natural light coming in the windows!
Open drapes all the way (for privacy, I typically have people get dressed privately anyway, and I only photograph the little details, like the last few buttons of the dress, etc.)
Turn OFF lights — it’s a misconception that more light is better. The truth is, it has to be GOOD light! I promise, I’m better off with only natural light coming in the room (and if it’s too dark, I have my own lighting).
Clean up!! You can maybe designate one bridesmaid to help put everything away. Keep people’s bags packed as much as possible, and put it all in a closet or hidden away some other way. This is so simple but often quite overlooked, but it can make a world of difference in the photos! And make sure the bed is made (you can even have maid service turnover the room before I arrive so the bed doesn’t look slept in). When in a hotel, it’s best to have a suite rather than just a room. This way, you can designate one of the spaces (whichever has more natural light) for a nice photo area but people can make a mess of the other area as they get ready.
These are my top tips that I don’t see anywhere else! My brides receive more extensive wedding planning guides compiled by me.
